Men's cum loads are in my view the elixir of life and of youth and beauty, they having the unique function of making a person look young. When I was a crossdresser, I enjoyed sucking men's penis partly for pleasure and partly for eating this elixir, which in my view keep (still do) my looks young, and my skin soft and smooth, especially my skin,
It is my firm belief that rubbing men's cum onto my face is more rejuvenating and refreshing than any brand of skin-whitening/softening cream on sale in public. I like men to shoot their cum direct into my mouth, so it won't drip down anywhere to cause a waste of such precious resource. Alternatively I ask men to grant me the favour of ejaculating into a condom or a cup, whichever is at hand, so I can eat this elixir of youth and beauty direct from what little drops are successfully collected.
The way I looked as a crossdresser could not have been described as anything near to being pretty. I wasn't taking female hormones regularly....as I do now as an escort...and I had not a bit of facial feminization surgery, which is the KEY to the beauty of all T-girls.
Having said that, I wasn't ugly, because I had a nice-looking shoulder-length wig on, and the skirt I put on as my 'work uniform' was very short, so very short that if I took big steps my butt cleavage could be seen from behind -- because while crossdressing at night to seek fun I was NEVER in panties, with just a sexily patterned bra as my only underwear.
The male toilet was the best workplace that could be for crossdressers, because there are separate closets that can be locked from the inside. I usually got myself hidden inside one of the closets during the hours between 2.30 am and 3.30 am, and there I sat on the toilet bowl with my hands massaging my own nipples to turn myself on to that heated passion level needed to give me the guts and audacity to leave to closet in case a suitable target, a man, entered the toilet.
If two men entered the toilet at the same time, I never ventured out from the toilet, because handling two men could be dangerous, leaving me no chance for an escape in case the men were marauding sex maniacs.
If it was a single man or a boy I would open the closet door to surprise him over being in the same toilet with a girl. Single men/boys were quite often willing to have some fun with me, such as allowing me to suck them off, because we could do that in the security of a locked closet -- and I always told them before the action I would not ask them for money to set their heart at ease.
Between 2.30 am and 3.30 am I invariably woke up with a start...my heart beat accelerated, and I was carried along like a flimsy sampan in the torrent of a great river of passion: I HAD to put on girls clothes to go out onto the street to ...to just walk around...and if the right opportunity came...to have sex with a lone man/boy passing by in the darkness.
I caressed my nipples until they inflated like two little big red beans, and onto them I put on a bra...any bra I could find at hand, and off I went out, leaving the door key at the inside of a flowering pot. Quite often I just wandered around aimlessly, because there was no suitable target, for if two men/boys walked together I couldn't approach them -- two persons posed against one...me...was much too dangerous. Anything could happen in the darkness of the night. If it was a lone man/boy, there was never any danger because he was afraid himself-- but if two guys were together they could do anything - could do just about anything to me, including a possible life-threatening situation.
(Picture Below : For over ten years, from the age of 13 onwards, I relied exclusively on masturbation to seek release from the TENSION building up inside me, day and night. To be able to make my small penis get hard enough to cum, I needed to put on a wig...with hair flowing down onto my chest and shoulders...and I MUST be in girls clothes.
I couldn't do it if somebody else was around, so although Papa required me to put on girls clothes at home, I couldn't get hard if he was around. So at night or while Papa was out at work, I never failed to masturbate at least once every 24 hours, usually at night at my bedroom, at around 2.30 am or within an hour after that.
I used to do it with my cock...penis and testicles...sandwiched in between my thighs...to simulate the 'flat and fat' pussy illusion. And then I squeezed my cock with my thighs, putting as much pressure to it as possible. Meantime, I used my finger tips to caress my own nipples to make believe that my small breasts were being massaged by the fingers of a man.
I then also made believe that I was being fucked in my asshole by a man. Sometimes that made me cum, but at times, it didn't work. So I chose to do it in another way. I sat atop a basketball....with my testicles pulled way backward in between the v-cavity in between my thighs, while using the surface movement....the rolling...of the ball to stimulate my small penis.
So if normal masturbation....having my cock sandwiched between my legs....didn't work, this 'penis-being-caressed-by-ball' routine could eventually make me cum -- and I was so relieved that after ejaculating my cum load, I felt relaxed enough to go back to sleep. And then I had no need to take the RISK of crossdressing in the darkness out on the street, as that might lead to police arrest or possible attacks from hooligans who hated gay or transgender people.
(Picture Above : I started crossdressing at the age of 13. In that early morning hour between 2.30 am and 3.00 am I often woke up with a start.
My heart kept pounding...my heart beat rate accelerated...and almost as I were being pushed by a force beyond my control, I put on light makeup...got mother's wig on...and then got my chest propped up with one of the many beautifully patterned, embroidered bras left behind by my dead mother at the wardrobe drawers.
Then within 15 minutes after I had woken up, I sneaked out from my home, leaving the key beneath a carpet just outside the main door, and closing the door gently, so as not to wake up Papa.
I wandered aimlessly around, and did NOT seek out any man/boy for sex, for fear of being arrested. I kept doing this kind of street wandering for a year before I got sufficiently confident about my female disguise to approach a lone man/boy at the darks streets for sex, which was usually one simple sucking off of his penis. That gave me joy, because it made me feel like a girl, and I so wanted to be a girl.
At 13, my whole being was burning hot with the desire to be a girl, and yet I was a boy. Papa had already discovered that I liked crossdressing, and he was sleeping with me, having sex with me practically every night.
Yet I wanted to try something new, having a different penis inside me aside from that of Papa. There was a construction site near a wood being cleared for a new building. Many of the construction workers were Africans, and at night, I often saw from my bedroom windows a few of them wander into the wood to urinate, because the wooden houses they lived in had no toilet.
I sneaked out from home one night when Papa was not at home on some business. I walked into that little wood, dressed in shorts and T-shirt. I put on whitening cream to make my whole body very white and smooth-looking, with all the hairs on my arms and legs having been shaved off.
Yes I saw one big African man, over six feet tall, having just his underpants on and he was getting ready to pull out his penis to pee.
I walked up to him...I pushed down my shorts to let him my small cock and lily white butt. I got down on my knees...pulled down his underpants...and began sucking him. Oh, IT was huge, nearly 9 inches when hard. And then without saying a word, he got me down on my hands and knees and began penetrating me.
I didn't expect it to be sooooo tough, for his penis just rammed into my asshole, unrelentingly. I just couldn't take it...too painful...and within minutes...three minutes, I should say... I forcibly pulled his penis off...and off I ran as fast as possible.
For days afterwards, there was pain in my asshole...intermittently...and sometimes I saw on the toilet tissues faint blood marks. I was terrified, and didn't have sex with Papa for nearly a week, saying that I was not feeling well.
After two weeks, I recovered, and I never dared to venture into that wooded area...where those African workers were...because their penis was just toooooo huge for me to take.
i have consulted Master regarding how i should
proceed with writing this blog. His view is that if i continue to be so afraid of having my blog suspended or deleted, i may as well write nothing at all. i am just a stupid girl with limited intelligence and no education, and being punished by having my blog eventually suspended should be a very good way of teaching me that i should give up reading and writing altogether. i may as well concentrate my energy on learning how to serve men and how to do my cooking and cleaning better.
What i am writing, Master reminds me, is of no significance ...all absolute trash...and He thinks that i may just let this blog be suspended as well, if i continue to be so shy, so afraid and so timid. He says that if i just say things like they are, i am doing nothing wrong. If being honest with my past experience means eventual suspension of this particular blog, Master says, then let it be.
The following account of my past life as a crossdresser was written under guidance from Master (to show my humility and submission, when referring to myself, 'i' use 'i' instead of 'I' when the presence of Master is mentioned or hinted at). i often forget that and because of my disobedience, i have been deservedly whipped hard on my butt for DOZENS of time...10 lashes each time...very painful (!)... for using 'I' instead 'i' -
i started my career in the adult industry by working as a shemale escort with a full, though dysfunctional little cock.
Before becoming an escort, i was a male secondary school teacher teaching history and literature. i taught in the daytime as a man...my big breasts being wrapped tight and bound flat... but i crossdressed at night...at least once a week... to become a girl to have sex with men at street corners and public parks.
In the small hours of the morning...usually in between 2.30 am and 4.30 am... i would loiter around the dark streets to try to get hooked up at roadside with a guy -- any man or boy walking all alone.
When a guy passed by, i would just tell him that i was a shemale...i just lifted up her mini skirt to let the guy have a look at my soft , white little cock... and then i would take the guy's hand direct to where the softness of my breasts was. As a rule...just to avoid misunderstanding...i would just tell the guy direct that i would like to be fucked by him -- but at no cost to him, and no service fee whatsoever would be charged.
(In the evening...when Papa was not home..I liked putting on ponies, bra and skirt...I looked at myself in the standing mirror...took selfis...and then if Papa was not returning home for the night, I would go out to the street as a schoolgirl...I liked being embraced, caressed and then fucked by men. Many men agreed to have sex with me...usually I sucked them off at dark street corners...some would go further to fuck me in my asshole, which I liked because it turned me on. My small penis could only get hard while I was being fucked by a man. My evening crossdressing was eventually discovered by Papa when one night as I was back home in girls clothes, the lights were suddenly turned on, with Papa appearing right in front of me. I was expecting to be whipped, but to my surprise Papa said,' You like being a girl ? I'll make you one' He took me into the backroom and had me fucked with me still in girls clothes. That was when I was 13, and I had been having sex with Papa for nearly 10 years before I left home to live independently after having got my university degree.)
To attract the guy, i would get down on her knees to unzip the fly of his trousers...take out his penis...massage his manhood with my small hands...and then i would suck the guy's cock to make him happy.
If that was agreeable to the man, he would then take me either to a public park, a hidden street corner, or to a hotel, where i would finally get what i had wanted. i would most gladly spread open my legs to let the guy fuck me in my asshole --while letting him squeeze, suck and twist...or even bite... my little cock at the same time. That was fun to me. That was what i liked -- and that too was my passion.
Looking back, i... as a post-op ladyboy escort as from November 2014... find my past life as a shemale with a puny little cock most unforgettably sweet -- and i would very much like this picture of mine to be uploaded for anybody who shares my dark passion.
(Me...being penetrated hard and fast by Master on 21st May 2013...at that time my cock ...as you may see...still got a bit hard while i was being fucked in my asshole from the front. Each anal sex session lasted for about 20 minutes and to make me more girly Master and his six friends had me fucked at least 7 times a day, so each man could at least have one try in helping to make me a girl. At the same time, i could also be trained to get adjusted to the penis at different sizes so as to prepare me for my future job as a shemale escort.)
(On 15 April 2013, about three weeks after i had signed a slave contract to prepare myself to become a shemale escort, Master took me to a registered doctor to have a whole-body medical checkup.The woman doctor helped pierce my ears...two holes at each ear lobe...so I could wear ear rings 24/7, something I never did before as I had wanted to hide my ladyboy identity.
My breasts as you can see were very small, looking almost flat like a male chest when fully extended in bed. The doctor gave me female hormone injections...at my belly..on both sides of my naval button...very painful...but the doctor said that injections administered on the belly would be absorbed into the blood stream more easily than if injections were made at my arms. The doctor used waxing to remove all my body hairs, and I found the removal of my armpit hair and pubic hair especially painful since both spots were very sensitive.
The woman doctor gently massaged my cock...caressed my penis...and when she felt that my penis was hardening, she somehow knit her brows, asking ,' You want to be a girl ?' Master made a sign for me to say 'Yes'. The doctor then took out a big needle. I was so afraid...I struggled and wanted to get out of bed. Master immediately removed his leather waist belt...forced me down onto bed again...and had my butt whipped really hard. I got 10 lashes, 5 on each of my butt cheeks
The doctor asked me to say sorry to Master, and then she said, ' Don't worry. She is a nice boy...look at her white soft and smooth skin...only very obedient boys have such white skin like a girl's.' That helped stop my poor butt from getting further punishment... and then the doctor gave me two injections, one at each of my testicles...very painful...I yelled in pain...but Master told me to hold up my leg to allow the doctor to give me one more injection at my penis. The doctor explained to Master that those three injection shots would have to be done once every week, while the injections on my belly must be done every other day on a continuous basis before my castration.
The combined effects of those female hormone injections would make me more feminine and submissive...she told Master that after I had had such injections I would become very timid and shy and like a girl, I would obediently get down on their knees to be whipped ...my skin would get softer and more smooth...and what was most important, my cock would shrink in size as a whole -- and that particular shot at my penis would make my penis shrink faster in size if later I was indeed castrated. Master took me to this clinic several times a week from then on.
The woman doctor was very kind and each time when she saw the pain on my face as I was receiving the injections at my belly and my cock, she would say, 'A boy like you with such pretty face and skin should be a girl. I will help make you a girl. But first you must make your penis as short, soft and small as possible. Men like small-cock ladyboys.' I told the doctor that both Papa, Master and other men would whip me if i got hard without permission The doctor promised to give me injections at my penis with heavier female hormone dosage to make my penis dysfunctional as soon as possible, so it could never get hard again. I was so relieved when she said that !).
Shortly after i had been found by Master to have embezzled company funds for my own use, i was taken to Master's home where I was stripped naked to check, as Master said, 'if i had hidden any money on my body.'
Master noticed that i was in bra and panties under my male shirt and trousers...he asked me why i had breasts. i told Him that i was raised at home as a girl and had been a crossdresser since childhood. He asked me whether i was on female hormone...i said 'yes'...then He removed the wrappings over my breasts and exclaimed,' Nice...your boobs are big...how big ?' i said 34 "...then Master took off my panties, and saw that my cock was also wrapped up and bound tight. Again He asked me why. i explained that i wanted to keep my cock...especially my penis...small, short and soft.,.i didn't like it because it looked ugly... so I got my cock wrapped tight to stunt its growth.
Master said He was going to send me to the police for stealing His money....I was so scared...I knelt down...sobbed...and begged for forgiveness. Master said okay...but first i must let Him fuck me, and then i must sign a contract to become His slave. If i was obedient and girly enough, He said, i would be allowed to keep my cock.
If on the other hand i was too boy, He would arrange to have me castrated. I immediately agreed...knelt down to kowtow to Master for letting me go...and in the same evening, Master asked me to sign a slave contract in the presence of...and witnessed by...a lawyer who was His friend.
In the months that followed i underwent basic training to become a girl....i was in girls clothes and lingerie 24/7 and Master and his close friends...five of them...took turns to have me fucked in the asshole. I was told that to avoid a possible prison term of 3 years for my crime of embezzlement, i would be required to work as a shemale escort to make some money to pay back to Master the money i had stolen from Him. i was required to grow long. shoulder-length hair...like any girl...and Master started asking me to do all sorts of housework as a maid. Doing housework was not difficult...I was used to it when I lived with Papa...but since i was too boy in behaviour, Master had my but spanked three times a day...in the morning when He woke up...in the afternoon...and in the evening when He returned from work...Master said that i had a big round butt and well deserved to be spanked like any naughty girl.
When Master had me fucked, He did it from the front, since if He did it from my back, my asshole was too small for his 8-inch hard penis. i myself sometimes got hard while being penetrated, and that made Master angry. He got me whipped hard for that...very painful....so as soon as i felt my penis was getting hard, i had to beg Master on my knees for permission to get hard.
The picture above was taken in September 2013...about 6 months into my slave contract...as you can see my hair had grown long, and since Master started giving me injection-type female hormones in April 2013, my cock as a whole was shrinking in size, and my penis stayed soft and small most of the time, and could no longer get hard even while i was being penetrated.
Between March and August my penis still got a bit hard when Master and His friends squeezed and caressed it...Master increased my female hormone intake dosage...and in early September, my penis shrank to less than 2 inches in length...from its previous length of just under 3 inches...and while Master was having me penetrated, my little pee pee...for the first time in my life...stayed obediently soft...it just sort of dangled and fell backward all the time. i was quite sad that i could no longer get hard, but Master and his friends celebrated with champagne for having made me complete the first stage of my MtF transition, which was that my penis had been made to become 100 per cent dysfunctional.
As Master and his friends were checking, groping and squeezing my penis to make sure that it would stay soft on all occasions, i felt so sad and sobbed...but Master said, ' You have seen nothing yet...we have decided to cut off your balls !' I got down on my knees to beg them not to castrate me....everybody laughed as i was sobbing and kowtowing, begging for Master to show me mercy...'Please don't cut off my balls...pleaseeee...too painful !!' But everybody just laughed, and they took videos of how I was being fucked with my full cock on...because they said that in December i would say good-bye to my balls.'
I would be allowed to keep my penis though, so that men could have more fun by squeezing, pulling and pushing my little pee pee while i was being fucked as a shemale escort, a job i must take up immediately after my castration in December 2013.
Although I did cross dress for a period of nearly 10 years, the number of times I had had sex with men was limited to about 3 every six months, because not every man/boy I approached on the street was interested in having sex with me. Their main fear was that I might be HIV positive. In addition, I did all that in secret, and nobody except Papa knew about my night adventures ...and Papa wouldn't talk about it because he himself might be in trouble if it was known that I had been having sex with him at home.
Therefore, in all outward appearance...both at university and at the school where I taught...I was a decent, hardworking young man with a bright career ahead of me, since my academic results were quite good.
Therefore I did have PRIDE and DIGNITY as a man, and Master's aim during the months immediately before my castration was to break my pride and strip me of my dignity as a proud university graduate with a good honours degree , having also had a good work performance record as a part-time male secondary school teacher at a boys' school.
In the first four weeks following the signing of my slave contract, Master did a number of things to me of which i am so ashamed even till now....
(Me ...December 2015...2 years after castration...working hard at Master's home as housemaid)
(Master and his six close friends all have sons in their teens, and they were aged between 8 and 17, with Master's son being the eldest. The fact that i had become a slave of Master's was soon known to his son and he suggested that since he and his teenage friends...the sons of Master's six close friends...had never had any experience or sex with girl, they would want to explore their own manhood and my femininity by having me served them after school. Within the span of about three weeks, Master invited all seven boys...His own son and those of his six friends...to have sex with me.
At first the idea of having sex with such small boys very much upset me, causing me nausea. After all I had been a teacher, and an adult, and being fucked by boys as young as eight was in my view not just indecent but actually outrageous. The boys however drew lots to decide on who should penetrate me first, to be followed by the second boy...the third boy...and so on...until each boy was given at least two chances of having sex with me.
The first boy to have sex with me happened to be just an 8-year-old boy, who was just at the onset of puberty. He was dark and small, just as tall as my breasts. I had just signed my slave contract, and was still in shirt, tie and trousers...the same clothes i was wearing when Master took me to His home to conduct his investigation into my crime of embezzlement...the boy said, 'Take off your shirt and let me play with your tits !!' I got angry...such a small boy and so horny...he should be punished for his impoliteness, I thought. So I not only did not take off my shirt, but I removed my waist belt and took him up to my lap to have him whipped on his butt for impudence. The boy yelled for help, and in came Master.
Master shouted at me, 'Either you go to jail for stealing my money or you obey this boy...get down on your knees to say sorry to this boy if you don't want me to call the police !' I was very frightened...so I knelt down at the feet of the boy to say 'sorry' to him. Master soon left, telling the boy that if i dared to resist Him, the boy himself could just call the police direct because i had stolen His money.
The boy took the waist belt from my hands, and said,' Get down...pull down your trousers...I must have your big butt whipped for impoliteness.' I took off my trousers immediately, leaving just my girlie panties on. 'So you are in panties like a girl, uh ?' I said 'yes' because I had been raised as a girl since childhood. And then the boy seized hold of my cock...held it in his left hand,...while using his right hand to have my cock whipped several times...very painful !!
I was thinking that the boy would like to have me fucked immediately, but instead he stuck to his first request,which was to unbutton my shirt so he could play with my breasts...and played he did...long and hard...until I moaned in pain begging for mercy. He left after having had my breast squeezed, caressed and fondled for about 15 minutes. As he was leaving, he said he had not done with me yet, and would come back to play other parts of my body the following day.)
Immediately after i had signed my slave contract...in March 2013...Master required me to let my hair grow to shoulder length, and when the required hair length was attained towards the end of May, He arranged for my ears to be pierced, with two piercings at each of my ear lobes, so as from the date I acquired shoulder-length hair and with two ear rings at each of my ears, my life as a crossdresser was ritually terminated, because anybody with such long hair...with ear rings at both ears...and in skirt...would be immediately recognized as a girl.
At just 5'4" and about 103 lbs, i am small even by female standards, and my asshole is (still is !!) proportionally small. Master required me to have a butt plug stuck into my asshole 24/7 to loosen my asshole, but still having me penetrated was a struggle. Master came to the conclusion that my asshole must be loosened not with a butt plug, but with a big penis, so I could get used to my future life as a shemale escort.
One day, as i was doing corner time for disobedience, Master brought home a big, gigantic black man, who must be over 6'10" tall, and He said i was going to be fucked by that black man as initial practice for my future escort work. i went down on my knees to beg Master not to ask that black man to have me fucked, but my request was denied.
That black man's penis must be over 9 inches hard, and I could just take in about 3 inches of his big penis. The pain was so excruciatingly great that I yelled out in pain. Fortunately Master didn't let that torture to go on...it lasted just 5 minutes but already it felt like an eternity. The black man spoke just a little English and was a security guard at a building nearby.
Starting from that day, he was hired my Master to come to have me fucked for 5-10 minutes as a daily submission training routine for getting my asshole loosened with his human butt plug. The giant was very gentle with me, and caressed my body all over each time before having me fucked...but it didn't help...it was so painful...until one day i knelt down at Master's feet and said, 'Please Sir, don't ask me to take in that black penis anymore...i won't dare to behave like a boy anymore, Sir...please cut away my balls so i can be more obedient.'
Master smiled...had my request for castration recorded as evidence of my compliance so i wouldn't retract my promise later...and from that day on, I didn't see that black man anymore -- what a relief !
(This size comparison picture shows how hopelessly small I was as a boy. I am just big enough to be a girl...and a small girl at that !! The forearms of that black man were much bigger than my thighs ! His penis was as large as my forearm and, when in rock-hard erection it seemed to be LONGER than my forearm. Every day after I had been penetrated in my asshole by that giant penis, I couldn't excrete at all and I began to develop constipation after just one week of such painful PIN-point, big-penis drill. I came to the conclusion that agreeing to be castrated would be the only exit I had from such hellishly big penis !! )
After my castration in December 2013, my weight dropped from 115 lbs to just 98 lbs because after the surgery, I couldn't eat much...and was losing muscles all over my body... all that happened in just about four weeks.
My body became markedly much slimmer and smaller. My penis...with its balls having been cut off...shrank dramatically in both length and width, becoming really very, very small as you can see here by comparing my penis with the fingers of one of my students who, by the way, came in groups of three or four each...not necessarily to have me fucked...but to pay...quite a bit, USD 30.... to just take a look at my poor little penis to see how it looked after castration -- and then they liked stroking my castrated penis...swinging it left and right...up and down...like a toy... to see if it could still get hard. When they noticed that I couldn't get hard after all, they laughed, saying 'Teacher is not a man anymore...penis so soft...skin so white and smooth...no hairs anywhere !!' And my face flushed red when they said that, and they laughed at me again when I said, 'Thank you Sir for playing with my little pee pee.'
The removal of my testicles enabled me to easily absorb female hormones without interference from the male hormone testosterone which was out of production because of the cutting off of its factories, my testicles.
One effect of this total absorption of female hormones into my body was that my skin became transparently white in a creamy sort of way that is typical of the skin of a girl , very soft looking and very smooth. My brownish nipples turned pinkish in just weeks, and my breasts ...which had consistently measured just at 33 inches for years... were cropping up like mad, and within just three months after my castration, my bust size was upgraded to 35 inches.
I seemed soooooo small when compared to the average size of my boy students. And my skin was so white -- and when the boys touched me on my nipples and penis I trembled all over from contact with their coarse, hard fingers ...their skin colour was so brown, almost dark...I didn't notice that at all when I taught them...and my skin was so creamy white. THAT sent a hardening feeling, like electricity, to my penis which didn't really get erect, but it could be felt to be hardening by the groping hands of my students.
Some naughty students scolded me...and then had me spanked...for getting hard without their permission. A strange feeling of excitement...which shouldn't have been there but was solidly there in force despite the humiliation I went through...came all over me as I got down on my hands and knees...in tears... to be whipped on my butt by my students for daring to get hard.
I feel that as I am becoming more girl...more feminine and dependent...I also simultaneously become very submissive, to the point of feeling HAPPY...really so...not feigned... because of being controlled, humiliated and disciplined by men/boys.
(Days after i had agreed to be castrated, Master got started a routine training procedure which lasts till now. It is that i must be spanked...either hand spanked or spanked with a wooden pad/table tennis bat ...two times a day for about 10 minutes each time -- once in the early morning immediately after i have served breakfast to Master on my knees...at his bedside...and once immediately before Master goes to bed at 11.00 p.m.
Master finds that while i am being spanked, my nipples soon get firm and erect, and in those days when i still had a small penis, he could see that my pee pee started hardening as i was moaning and begging for mercy during my well-deserved, much needed feminizing spanking routine.
Master asked me why. i explained that during my days as crossdresser, my nipples and penis both got hard and erect while i was being humiliated by men by being made o get down on my knees to suck their cock -- and then i could leak out one or two drops of very thin, watery cum while i was BEING spanked or whipped on my butt by a man. i apologized to Master for getting hard without permission, but to my surprise Master said, 'Good...men like to see you get hard, so they can make your penis get retracted and smaller in any way they like.'
That 'any way they want' later turned out to be that some men liked having my penis pinched, squeezed or whipped when it was seen to be hardening. Some men....mostly mature middle-aged men were more lenient...they just made my penis get retracted and contracted by having icy cold water poured onto it. My former students mostly preferred to use a small cane to punish me for getting hard, as revenge for my having been so strict on them...made them stand in class...when I was a male teacher. My teachers, remembering me as a hardworking, obedient boy, generally just used (cups of...several cups were needed) cold water to get my pee pee retracted and smaller.
I often apologized to men/boys for getting hard...but nobody ever forgave me, so that in my days as a castrated shemale escort, my poor little penis was actually suffering more pain and punishment than my butt !! Gradually I started to HATE having a penis and eventually I simply had to cut it off at any cost, albeit very painful indeed !!)
(Me : Being fucked by one of my former teachers within a month after my castration. As my teacher was having me fucked really hard in my asshole, I moaned in pain and begged for mercy. My teacher said that I should have chosen to have my breasts...rather than my balls...cut off, and then I wouldn't have to be fucked, used and humiliated by men like this for the rest of my life. As I looked back at this picture of myself , it might really be true that I could have looked very handsome as a man .)
Me - lying in hospital bed on 10 December 2013 awaiting my castration. Note that I was still having a male haircut, and my breasts remained noticeably small, and were almost pulled flat when I was lying on bed with my body fully extended. The male hormone testosterone, which was secreted by my testicles, were actively preventing the absorption of much of the female hormones I was taking, causing some sort of block. I needed to take anti-androgen ( anti - male hormone) pills to remove that block, which in turn obstructed the growth of my breasts. That was one reason why Master decided that my testicles must be cut away to get rid of the testosterone supply to my body so my breasts could grow larger.
I was so very scared by the dreadful prospect of having my testicles cut off. That looked really painfully bloody, and I was afraid that the surgery would take too long and therefore would give me much pain. I therefore prayed to God to give me blessing so I could go through the surgery without any unforeseen incident. With God's blessing, I successfully got castrated.
My testicles...my nuts or balls...were NOT thrown away. Master had requested the doctors to wash my removed balls clean, and then they were put into a bottle of very old champagne. In front of my eyes, while i was in bed, Master immersed my balls into the champagne...stirred them...so that they sank to the bottom of the bottle.
In traditional Chinese medicine, champagne mixed with animal testicles would give vitality, vigour and strength to the penis of any man who drinks it. It is believed that just one small spoonful of such aphrodisiac would help maintain a man's erection for a full hour. After i had fully recovered from my castration, Master asked me to pour a small spoonful of champagne from the bottle in which my balls were immersed. My balls were basically small, and are looking even smaller...in fact keep shrinking in size... inside the champagne bottle.
I notice that Master DOES have longer staying power inside me...by more than 20 minutes longer...each time he takes just a sip of the aphrodisiac champagne. It seems to be work, and Master sometimes treats two of his closest friends..his business partners...to this special champagne which has my balls immersed and mixed with it.
Whenever the men see my balls inside that champagne bottle as I am taking it up...while on my knees... to pour some champagne for them, they will ALWAYS ask, 'Are these your balls, Jennifer ?' I have to say 'Yes' and then, almost as a routine procedure, they will lift up my skirt and take a look at my bottom and then they will say, 'Yes they are gone and are inside this bottle !!' Each time, they laugh...very loudly...right at my face... they are still doing that...and that makes me feel so shy, embarrassed and ashamed.
Picture Above : As I was a university graduate with a good honours degree and having done very well academically at school, I was rather well-known both at school and university as a brilliant scholar, albeit a bid weird...probably gay... because I looked so very feminine with my soft facial features, white smooth skin and had hands and feet much too small for a man.
As a secondary school teacher, however, I tried my very best to put up a macho image, rubbing brownish cream onto my face and hands to make them look ' more man' and every early morning before I went teaching, I carefully put on a fake mustache, along with having some fake post-shaving shadowy black hair stubs pasted onto my chins and jaw to fake that early morning 5 o'clock shadow men usually have when waking up in the morning..
As an important step of my femininization, i was ordered by Master to send emails to my past students, schoolmates and boyhood friends to cross the Thailand-Malaysia border to have me fucked at a small farmhouse owned by Master.
In my emails,...as instructed by Master...i revealed to my past acquaintances everything about my secrets, and i begged them to have me fucked like a girl, so i would be more girl, and i invited them to see for themselves that i was in fact a ladyboy. I promised to be obedient, and would be willing to get down on my knees to be whipped if found disobedient. All i wanted was to be more girl, softer, becoming as submissive as any obedient girl should be.
Not many of my past acquaintances came, because most of them were in disbelief : How could that be, me, a strict teacher and a hardworking student, becoming a shemale escort ? But a few of my NAUGHTIEST students...those big tall boys who I often punished by being made to stand in class...did turn up. When they saw for themselves that I really looked so feminine with my brownish skin cream having been removed....sort of peeled off to reveal my bright, white skin....and my cock being so small...less than three inches...my butt so round like a girl's...they spread the NEWS around, confirming that 'Teacher is really a ladyboy and his cock is sooooo very small...tits sooooo big'.
Then dozens more of my students came, and the trickles of my bookings steadily accumulated to become a torrent in mid-2014, when literally hundreds of my former students were lining up on the my escort booking list to be my personal 'F B I', 'Female Body Inspector'. That kicked stated my 'career' as an escort -- with my clients consisting mainly of my past students in the age range from 13 to 17.
(Picture Above : After signing my slave contract with Master, i was no longer allowed to cut short my hair, and so for the fist time in my life, my hair was allowed to grow freely, flowing down onto my shoulders at shoulder-length. And under supervision from Master, i was taking heavy doses of female hormone on a daily basis, so that the paces of my femininization picked up, it getting onto such a fast track as never. When my students met me again at that farmhouse where I attended my appointments, they hardly recognized me, because my appearance had changed so much. These were the things they always did with me -
1) They asked me to take off my bra and then they used their hands to squeeze and press my breasts to see if they were soft, natural and real, for they all had heard that many ladyboys had fake, very hard breasts propped up by silicon implants . When they confirmed that my breasts were both soft and real, they always said, 'Nice', 'Cute' and started caressing my nipples to make them stand firm and erect.
2) They didn't right away pull down my panties to see if I still had a cock. They just used their hands to...at first timidly...grope and touch the front, V-spot of my girlie panties to see if that little bulge visibly seen beneath my panties was my cock. They felt that it was small, and then that made them curious enough to push down my panties.
Master had carefully bound up my cock with a soft but tight rope to make it smaller and more docile-looking, and that little lump of my tiny cock...tightly bound up, sort of dripping, weakly soft...never failed to turn on the boys whose reaction was always this 'Yes very small indeed.' They had heard that ladyboys usually had small cocks, and that was why ladyboys liked to be girls. Which as you all know is not true, because some ladyboys do have big cocks with a huge penis, and yet they want to be girls. Anyway, my small, tightly-bound cock was ALWAYS my best selling point for as long as I still had it before it cut off in November 2015.
3) Everybody who came... former students, schoolmates, teachers, colleagues and boyhood friends...REQUIRED me to get down on my knees at their feet to suck their penis until they cum onto my face and breasts. And they kept taking pictures of me while their penis was pushing in and out of my mouth. Those pictures were then circulated among their friends circles, and in that way the size of clientèle was gradually getting larger.
4) Master had instructed me to get down on my hands and knees with my butt raised way up to await being either spanked and/or fucked by my clients. i did that, with a small rod/table tennis bat being held in my mouth to obediently accept my needed punishment which in Master's view would help to get rid of my male pride, dignity and any memory of my past as a boy. My boy students enjoyed having my poor butt whipped with either a rod or a table tennis bat, because they found it such fun to hear me helplessly moan from pain, while begging in tears for mercy. After I had been spanked, some students just let me go, preferring to spend time to caress my body...all over...from face to feet...but some naughty boys preferred to have me penetrated immediately, often brutally - which i couldn't complain about because part of the pain i felt was my own fault, my asshole being born both small and tight.
Picture Above : After I had been castrated for disobedience in December 2013, I was sold to a night club to work as a castrated slave escort. With my balls having been cut off, my penis looked very cute, neat and small, often being able to retract...after being bound or washed repeatedly with icy cold water... to a tiny, nearly micro, lump-size of just two inches plus.
Whereas before my castration...when I still had my testicles...not many clients...indeed just one out of every ten....were interested in having me fucked in my asshole, in my castrated state ...between January 2013 (one month after the cutting off of my testicles) and November 2015 (when my penis was finally cut off)...EVERYBODY was keen to fuck me there.
I was unable to cope with that sort of excessive pounding...bombardment...of my asshole. The solution was to have a butt plug on at all time, 24/7, so my asshole was made readily loose and wide for penetration as soon as I was booked, and my clients...my boy students in particular...were in such HURRY to have me fucked there to 'help me become more girl'. But it looked very unsightly of me, with a stick-like butt plug sort of jutting out from my butt.
Fortunately a very naughty student of mine...who I had spanked several times at school for always failing in tests and exams...came up with a solution. He kindly purchased online for me the fox-tail-like butt plug you see in the above picture. With this fox tail on, my butt plug...which is (still using it !!)...makes me look more submissive, because I am having a tail like an animal's, and if I am collared as well...and on my hands and knees...I look most obediently...in my humiliated, humbled state... like a puppy. Practically all my clients like to pat me on my head when and if I have this fox-tail butt plug on, and having this butt plug on adds to my selling points.
Since the time...when I was 13...when my crossdressing obsession was discovered by Papa, I had been sort of being forced to live a rather unusual life as a boy. At day I went to school as a boy, but after school I changed into girls clothes, and did all the work girls are supposed to do...cooking, cleaning and embroidery...plus having to sleep with Papa...had sex with him...nearly every night.
That gave me a good deal of mental pressure, which I sought release through crossdressing as a girl to have sex with men at least two times a week. Some of the men I met up with on the street at night invited me to their homes, where they asked me to do all sorts of things, including using my breasts and cock to brush, rub and glide over their body to turn them on enough so they could have an erection.
I ENJOYED using my tits and pee pee to massage, caress and touch the hairy, coarse skin of men, \because that titillating friction never failed to make me itchy all over, flaming my blood into a torrent of hot passion. I guessed if I could get hard like any normal boy, I shouldn't have needed this kind close encounter of the dark/immoral kind with men, but as I was...not being able to get hard easily, and then always got punished/spanked by Papa and three of my schoolmates for just getting a bit...just a little bit, really... hard without permission...I did need those adventures at night...when men normally treated me quite gently...to seek release from the overwhelming TENSION I was consistently under because of being feminized to live like a girl...an obedient girl...whilst other boys could just went out to do outdoor sports.
I felt so inferior and my inferiority complex generated a tremendous desire inside me to somehow SUBMIT to men and be DISCIPLINED by them. It was a twisted way of seeking release from my tension, but it did work wonderfully in my own case.
You might have imagined that those men most interested in having sex with a crossdresser...like me...were all young men. The answer is an emphatic 'No'. In fact, most of the men who cared to take me to a remote corner...an isolated back lane...or a lonely beach...to have sex with me were either middle-aged men or old/much older men, some even as old as in their late 60's.
Having sex with old or much older men did not in most cases involve penetration of any sort. They just liked to use their hands to FEEL my smooth, white skin, followed by having me down on my knees to suck their cock. Nor did their cocks easily got hard -- most didn't.
One thing very nice about old/much older men was that they were never violent, and wouldn't physically abuse me even if I didn't make them happy. That was not the case with teenage boys where on one occasion (in Singapore) three boys ganged up and chased after me, intending to BEAT ME UP for not having made one of them happy enough.
Since that occasion, I hardly ever tried to approach young boys on the street, even if they were the only ones I saw on the street in the darkness of the night -- it was toooooo dangerous to approach them, and I wouldn't risk being kicked at by them.
(Me : Being fucked by Master and His friends after it had been proved beyond any doubt that i could not get hard like a normal male. i was afraid of having my cock sliced open like that...the way i saw it being done on a bull dog in a video...but Master said that if i didn't remove my balls, i would need to have those two much bigger balls on my chest...my breasts...surgically removed. He wouldn't allow me to retain both my breasts and my balls. Breasts are important to me...always...because they make me look so feminine and sexy.
Eventually, i made the very hard decision of having my balls cut off, so my breasts could be safe from the terrible fate of being cut off by the surgeon's knife.)
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I was castrated on 13 December 2013. Early in December, Master gave me one last chance to keep my cock intact, and He said that if somehow i could get hard in the two weeks immediately preceding my castration, He would not cut off my balls.
i was free to do whatever i could to make myself hard, which meant making my penis stand erect...and firm...for exactly one minute. If i could do that, Master said, He would give me the option to be just a shemale escort, instead of becoming a castrated shemale escort, as was stated in writing in my slave contract which I had signed in March 2013 -- in exchange for not being sent to jail for my having embezzled money from Master's company funds.
Master allowed me to go online to watch porn videos. So every day, for hours on end, i watched lots of online videos available free on various websites.
But the trouble was that while watching those videos, i was imagining myself to be the girl who was being fucked -- instead of thinking of myself as the man who was fucking the girl. Then I FORCED myself to make believe myself as being the man in all those videos, but it didn't work, either -- my penis remained, as ever, soft, almost as if it were lifeless.
In desperation i tried masturbation, but i had to do it under the close watch of Master and His friends. In fact, i could indeed occasionally, in one-to-two times out of ten, get hard by stroking my penis very hard for about half an hour, but i did that in private, not being watched over. Somehow, i just couldn't hard with so many men watching over me, and when some of Master's friends laughed at me for being unable to get my penis hard and erect, my face was flushed red, and my penis became even weaker than normal, drooping down like a crushed sausage.
Consequently my 2-week deadline was up, and Master decided that i couldn't get hard under any circumstances and well deserved to be castrated. Then Master and His friends...all six of them...took turns to have me fucked in my asshole, and in my mouth as well at the same time, to stop me from begging for mercy.
i knelt down at the feet of Master to beg Him to spare me the pain of castration, but Master's friends told me to keep calm because castration lasted for less than an hour in surgery, and wouldn't be painful as i would have thought.
They let me see a video on how a small bull dog was castrated. The veterinarian stretched out that dog's hind legs, spreadeagled them out wide and then used a sharp knife to make just one deep and precise incision into the balls of that bull dog. The bull dog barked loudly in pain as his balls were being forcibly squeezed out...sort of popping out... from the deep incision. It took about 15 minutes and the dog was surprisingly able to walk back to his cage to take a rest. Then, in rapid snapshots, the video showed the marked behavioral differences of the bull dog before and after castration.
Before castration, it was aggressive and unruly, refusing to take orders from his master - not to say to be collared. But after castration, it became soft, timid and docile. Its master put a collar on its neck, and it obediently allowed its master to tie it tight on its neck, with its head bowing in total submission as it was being towed round a backyard with a leash attached to that collar on its neck.
'See,' Master said, ' You will become more obedient after castration, like that dog.' 'Now put on this collar,' Master told me, handing me a dog collar. At that moment, i was thinking that if i acted a bit tough...trying to be really 'man'...Master might change His mind about having me castrated.
So i said,'I am not a dog..I had a penis and am a man... and I'm not going to put on this collar.' To my surprise, Master just laughed, saying, ' Okay, since we are all men, let's take off our shirts and play football at the backyard bare chested.'
Soon, all the men...all six of them...stripped themselves naked down to the waist. 'What about you ?' Master shouted at me, telling me to strip myself down to the waist, like others. i was so scared, because the backyard has rather low walls, and passers-by who were tall enough might be able to see what was going at the backyard from outside...and if i was naked...with my breasts exposed...that was toooooo shamefully embarrssing !
So i knelt down and begged Master to allow me to have shirt on -- because i had breasts, and i was not supposed to run around playing football naked like THAT. 'I am...a ladyboy...I can't play like you men..naked like that...people may look at my tits,' i said, getting down on my knees at the feet of Master to apologize for my disobedience.
The men all laughed, and then they took turns to have me spanked as punishment for my disobedience. After having been spanked, i was still required to play football with the men, because i had just said that i was basically a man. Actually i had NEVER played football in my life, because at school i was exempted from physical education lessons on the (false) medical ground that i had respiratory problems.
Master asked me to be His goal-keeper, because He said that i couldn't run fast enough. The men divided themselves into two opposing teams, with Master being in my team, and i was supposed to keep the ball from reaching anywhere near the net. The other side kept kicking the ball towards ME, and i was hit...banged... several times on my face and body by the ball. It caused me such pain on impact that i sat down and sob, with tears gushing out like streams down my cheeks from my eyes. I got down on my knees to beg Master to spare the pain and DANGER of playing this rough, completely savage game called ' a friendly football match' which in my view was anything but friendly.
So the game had to stop because of ME, and the men asked Master to have me spanked butt bare...right there beneath a tree at the backyard, under the sun...for my rudeness and disobedience. Master hand spanked me for five minutes, and then the men suggested that since they had no more ball game, they might as well play with my balls, which meant they liked stroking my ball-like-breasts and the two little balls hanging loosely beneath my penis.
The men took me back to the house, into my bedroom, and there they stripped me naked, so that they toyed, stroked, squeezed and caressed my four balls...my two breasts and two testicles...in pairs, with one man toying with my two big balls, meaning my breasts, while the other used his tongue, fingers and palms to lick, twist and caress my small testicles, my two little balls.
They said they had missed the fun of playing a good 90-minute football match because of my incompetence, so they went on and one, stroking and squeezing my four balls for exactly 90 minutes as compensation for the whole football game they missed.
At the end of it all, i felt so drained, with itchiness and pain mixed all over my body, and i myself had come to the same conclusion as that of Master and His friends, which was that i was not really suitable to be a man or even a teenage boy in puberty, because i couldn't get hard...i couldn't go outside the house anywhere bare-chested like men...and i couldn't even play a simple male game like football.
i was all naked in bed after having had a ferocious , almost brutal, ball game played on my four balls, and then Master left two piles of clothing at my bedside -- one being the men's shoes, underwear, shirt and trousers i used to put on as a teacher, while the other consisted of bra, panties and a low-cut one-piece mini skirt complete with a blouse. Master gave me 15 minutes to decide on which one of those two piles of clothing i would like to put on.
He reminded me that if i put on shirt and trousers He would need to give me other tests to see whether i was really suitable to be a man. If i passed those tests, He would consider sparing me the pain of being castrated in December 2013.
i would have preferred to put on shirt and trousers, but i was so afraid of going through other definitely tough tests. i was sure i would fail in them all. So i made up my mind to put on bra, panties and skirt...got into heels...and then i knelt down with my head bowed low as soon as Master and His friends entered the room to see what clothes i was in.
When Master and His friends saw that i was in female clothing, they clapped hands, and then they put on my neck a dog collar...had my cock bound and wrapped tight with soft ropes...and required me to do belly dance with my skirt and pulled up...bra pulled down... there being six little bells being clamped, two each onto each one of my nipples and penis. So i danced and danced, and the little bells chimed 'ding-dong, ding-dong' like that as i was wiggling my butt and waving my arms to synchronize with the dancing routines.
While dancing to the light music being broadcast on tape, i was so fearful....that castration scheduled for me soon must be very painful !!
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(Because I had been taking female hormone since the age of 13, my skin was very smooth even as I lived full time as a boy at day. In the darkness of the night, my burning desire to be a girl was consummated by having my lily white and silky smooth body full exposed to the stranger I met on the street, and then as he was entering me, either brutally or gently, I felt so relieved that I was at last a girl.)
In the tropics, it is very hot at night, and in the small hours in the morning, from 2.00 a.m. to 4..00 a.m., there was generally a flood of hot passion traveling through every vein in my body like streams of torrents.
So I needed to get get my body softened and whitened with whitening cream, and off I went into the darkness of the side streets in search of men to get myself relieved from that crushingly heavy pressure causing such tension at my small breasts and my soft, but very sensitive small penis. I never failed to spot a lone passer-by going home from night-shift work, and I would invite him to have sex with me.
I took his hand and moved it to my breasts...I let him touch me there...and then I let him see my small, neat little cock, with my penis being tightly wrapped up to show my willingness to submit to being used, fondled, caressed and fucked by the man like a girl, and I told him that I very much wanted to be fucked and used like a girl, because that would give me happiness.
Men simply treated me as a gay boy, and they seldom thought of me being in any way' trans-gendered', because that is an unfamiliar word in my part of the world.
I removed the layers of cloth wrappings around my small penis, and let him see that it was soft, short and USELESS as a weapon of penetration. That set the mind of the men at ease, because generally men are so afraid of meeting a ladyboy who may get on top of him, that is, a ladyboy having a penis stronger than theirs. As soon as the wrappings around my penis were off...and my small cock was exposed to full view... that unspeakably magic began to work, and I saw a big, rock-hard penis in front of me, in between the legs of the man.
The man would get very interested, seeing that it was so tame, docile and girly in a uselessly limp sort of way. Then he might either take me to a dark street corner where I MUST strip myself naked to show my humility and submission, and he, being a man, would be in the full dignity of being clothed. He would just open the fly of his trousers ...he commanded me to get down on my hands and knees...and there in the darkness of the street...or in bed at a cheap hotel room...I would meet my destiny as a boy preparing myself to be fucked and used like a girl -- a very weird way of thinking for most of you reading this, but I did NEED that feeling of being treated and fucked like a girl to FEEL happy and contented enough to live another day as morning dawned on the horizon.
(Me - Unwrapping the cloth bandages tied very tightly around my penis to make it smaller and softer to show my humility, submission ... oh yes, total surrender...to the men I had sex with.)
Picture Below : Over the long years of my crossdressing, I had accumulated lots of prettily sexy lingerie, which consisted mainly in bras and panties. I like the pink colour most of all, and I got a good stock of pink bras and panties, which I put on whenever I felt that uncontrollably passion to dress up as a girl, mostly at night, but sometimes at day too - if that passion got too strong to be controlled by my sense and reason.
Picture Below : My three schoolmates, who knew that I was a ladyboy, continued to have me fucked and toyed with after we had sat for the local high school exam, called S P M. My schoolmates had poor exam results and went to work after form 5, but since my results were very good....9As...I went on to matriculation on a government scholarship.
But my three schoolmates just wouldn't let go of me, and whenever they felt that need, they would phone me and I HAD to serve them, however busy I was with my studies, because they threatened me that if I didn't serve them obediently, they would reveal my ladyboy identity to the Ministry of Education and I would definitely lose my scholarship on the twin grounds of sexual deviance and moral indecency.
My three schoolmates continued to force me to have female hormone injections at my belly, at spots very near to my cock -- so, as they said, my penis would 'remain cute, short and small.
I was growing up and, as in the cases of all normal boys, I should have the human right to stroke my own penis to make it get hard to release my stress and tension. I begged my schoolmates NOT to inject female hormones so very near my cock, so that I could at least sometimes get hard to seek release. But that was denied, and my schoolmates would have my poor penis WHIPPED if they felt that it was getting hard when they stroked it.
To avoid being whipped at my penis, I dipped my poor pee pee into cups of hot water before I went to serve my schoolmates. The heat of the water did cause me a bit of pain, but it always successfully made my penis retract and contract to the smallest size possible, with a acute touch of softness that would satisfy my schoolmates, so that I wouldn't be unnecessarily given that horrible penis whipping.
It was a rainy night, with the rain outside my office pouring down like torrents. I was doing my routine overtime work to balance the profit and loss accounts which would lead to an assessment of the budget for the next financial year. I carefully JUGGLED the ledger figures to give me the flexible scope to, as it were, scoop up some funds here and there for my private use. I needed the money for buying pretty clothes, cosmetics, makeup kits and above all female hormones with which to make myself ever prettier...as a girl...at night. I had been doing this for nearly six months, and I was thinking that my crime...embezzlement would never be discovered.
But no, my manager suddenly appeared in front of my eyes...it was already 10.30 pm...he should have been gone hours ago. Yes he was there uncover my crime and my ladybody identity. He said that he had noted that something fishy...something criminal...was going on behind his back. And he had long suspected from the sissy way I behaved...wiggling my butt...folding my legs...skin being so white and smooth...that I might be a ladyboy.
So with ,my computer still on...with the budget figures...forged ones...still being displayed on the screen...he pointed out how I had cheated him...how I had stolen money form the company. I was in a panic...I was terrified and the my manager did what you see below to me, revealing my secret, which was that I had breasts and was a ladyboy, not a man as I claimed myself to be.
(Pictures Below : 'Unbutton your shirt and let me what you've got on your chest,' my manager ordered me.
In complete panic, I pulled up my shirt...removed the wrappings on my breasts...and had my breasts exposed in full view of the manager.
'Very nice soft tits you have, ' the managed murmured to himself and then his hands were all over my breasts, squeezing them...pressing them...and stoking them...in rhythmic alterations between brutal strength and gentle caress -- so that I was paralysed all over by the itchiness coming all over me.
Then the manager asked,' Do your students know that you are a ladyboy ?' 'No,' I said, ' I put on a fake beard when I was a teacher...and I punished any student very harshly if they ever dared to call me a sissy.' The manager took out two paper clips and had them clamped one each onto my nipples, saying, 'Tits so big...skin so white and smooth...and still pretending shamelessly to be a man, eh ?')
The manager then told me to lie flat, face up, on a work desk, so he could give me a 'total tits massage'. I did as I was told, because I knew that I am doubly guilty of embezzlement (stealing company funds) and forged identity (pretending to be man while in fact I was a ladyboy).
The company manager asked me why I didn't work as a ladyboy escort to earn money, because as a male assistant at the accounting department I really wasn't earning much. I told him that I was a university graduate and it just wasn't right for me to work as an escort, especially since I had formerly been a part-time teacher for four years.
'Why are you stealing money from me ?' the manager asked.
I said that female hormones, pretty trendy clothes and skincare creams were all expensive....and furthermore I needed money to make my breasts and butt bigger and rounder...like a real girl...and my salary wasn't enough for all that.
'Come, let me see your cock...if it is small enough I may let you go,' the manager said.
I was so very glad that I could have a chance to avoid going to jail, so I said,'Please sir, I need to go to the toilet first.'
The manager nodded his head but said in a rather angry tone,'Okay...do it quick - if you don't come out in 10 minutes I'll call the police.'
So I hurriedly went into the toilet...closed the door behind me...unzipped my fly ...took out my penis and dipped it into cold, running tap water at the basin. My penis contracted to the cold water....I took out my hair brush and comb and hit my penis hard ...over and over again..with the brush, and then I used the hair comb to sort of chop my penis like cutting a piece of meat...over and over again...I clenched my teeth and held my fists tight to patiently take the pain. It worked...my penis retracted...and thank God, contracted...violently to the sharp pangs of pain I inflicted on my own penis. Yes indeed it sort of got very soft and limp, withdrawing unto itself into a small lump.
'Time's up...come out or I'll call the police,' the manager shouted at me from outside the toilet.
I went back lying on the work desk again, and then the manager again started stroking my breasts, making my nipples stand very hard and erect this time.
'Very nice...big nipples...men will like you a lot,'the manager kept saying. 'Okay, let's see if your cock is of the right size,' the manager said, pulling down my trousers and underpants while saying so.
From beneath my glasses I stared at the manager - he was stroking his own penis...a huge one of about 8 inches, looking very hard...and when he saw my much retracted and contracted penis...resulting from the cold of the tap water and the pain of being beaten repeatedly with a hair brush and comb...he exclaimed, 'Very good...a small-cock ladyboy...you are worth a lot.'
And then he took out his hand phone and took pictures first of my breasts...with his large, dark hand on top of them, squeezing them...and then he took pictures of my small cock, with many snapshots on my small, soft and limp penis. Afterwards the manager ordered me to get dressed....once again I became a man again, with shirt, tie and trousers. He dragged me by my hair into his car, and then he drove me home, to his residence -- and thus I ended my long adventure as a crossdresser as a miserable captive, awaiting further punishment from my manager.
My manager is now my Master and i am now His obedient slave girl
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